I Was Kidding About The Sharks
Ok, there are no sharks. I just thought it would be a better experience if you thought you were going to be eaten by sharks, but then there weren’t any sharks.
Phew. What a relief!
So that’s the big spoiler: You will not be eaten by sharks.
If you still have questions and would like me to take them more seriously, I will. Just email me at firstname.lastname@example.org